England - The best in the world already!

[Guess]

In my daily read of the sports pages in the Italian Press it is being rumoured that England are now reformulating their strategy due to the unforseen circumstances yesterday evening.

With Switzerland maintaining, yet again, a clean sheet for 120 minutes and then being handed victory on a plate by the Ukrainian Chelsea striker, and then actually failing to score in three consectutive penalty kick attempts the England management have decided to go back to the drawing board.

The net effect of the outcome is that now Italy have inherited a smoother route to world domination it has also become a possibility that they may have to defeat England in the Final to get there.

This would prove a heart wrenching task for the England Captain, his wife and Gainfranco Lampardi (Beckham's mentor for off pitch strategies). It has also been rumoured that the Lampardi family have arranged a secret meeting with Roman Abramovitch with the view to assiting to find a resolution in this difficult situation.

An unnamed representative of Federazione Italiana Giuoco Calcio was interviewed with his entourage of lawyers and stated that the situation has gone past a point where it can be dealt with with underwear and hats and something more serious will be planned for the final games.

[olmate]

Its the game of Football and its the way it goes. It has been fantastic that the Soccaroos performed as well as they have and it will definitly raise the profile of this game in Australia judging by support since the start of the tournament.
Good luck to Ital and the remaining sides looking forward to some exciting semi and final action.

So do i now go for green and gold Brazil or the rat bastards that dumped the Sc#mbags of society upon our fatal shore over 200 years ago.

[Jockey]

Fifa has admitted that major mistakes have been made by referees at the World Cup. President Sepp Blatter, who had already publicly criticised the standard of the assistant referees, now wants to review the way every official is chosen and assessed. One or two major mistakes have been made said Fifa spokesman Keith Cooper, and he personally stepped in to oversee which officials were appointed for the semi-final matches, in an effort to avoid any further blunders. Tournament organisers have conceded that controversial decisions have affected crucial games. "Referees are only human and errors can never be entirely eliminated."

Spanish football federation president Angel Maria Villar has resigned from Fifa's referees commission - and intends to make a formal protest.

"We will explain that we have been negatively affected by their decisions," he said.

"The damage has now been done, but we want to make sure that this sort of thing does not happen again." The year? 2002 - world cup South Korea which in my opinion was marred by blatent cheating for South Korea.

This years world cup (2006) is marred (IMO) with incompetence rather than cheating, (perhaps I'm being naive).

The games now are so tight its the referees who becomes the most important figure on the park, not the players.

TECHNOLOGY SHOULD NOT BE A DEBATE - IT SHOULD BE A CERTAINTY FOR THE FUTURE. The game has become farcical. Its the referees decisions which win and loses games and 50% of the time they are wrong.

[Big Boy]

Jockey said:

wants to review the way every official is chosen and assessed.

Is the review going to include a check of bank accounts?

Incompetance I can understand, what I can't abide is blatant cheating. Some decisions have been so blatant, how can we be sure cheating is not involved unless a full check is carried out?

[Jaime]

Spanish football federation president Angel Maria Villar has resigned from Fifa's referees commission - and intends to make a formal protest.

"We will explain that we have been negatively affected by their decisions," he said.

"The damage has now been done, but we want to make sure that this sort of thing does not happen again." The year? 2002 - world cup South Korea which in my opinion was marred by blatent cheating for South Korea.

Yes, it still hurts. That was Spain's best team for years and their best chance of winning the cup, with a draw against a poor Germany waiting in the semi's had they not been cheated out of the quarter final game with S. Korea.

The only world cup to be held in Asia was also its most blatantly corrupt and the riots in Russia and Poland after losses to Japan and S. Korea were because the folks there knew that endemic corruption in their own societies meant that their players had been bought off (allegedly). The whole event was a farce from start to finish.

[caller]

So what about the referees?

Our own Mr. Gnome made some errors, but not too many on actual, "was it or wasn't it a foul?" Other games have been settled by the ref's incompetence. In fact, I would say that this has been the worst reffed tournament for a long time.

Italy v Oz - the sending off and penalty - penalty crucial.
Spain v France - free kick with player seemingly pole- axed
Holland v Portugal - too many to mention......and it goes on and on.

As for the teams? Is this not the most open competition in a long time? That has to be a good thing.

I'm even beginning to believe England can get to the semi's, having already met my prediction of the QF's!

[Guess]

According to Le Monde this morning:

The French team are no on a high after their defeat of the mighty Spanish. The now feel omnipotent.

The team are now in full preparation for the possible clash with England after the French side have defeated the under par Brasilians and the English continue their lucky run of wins against superior opposition.

The French team will be confined to their Hotel prior to the match and diet only on Heinz Baked Beans, Onions and Fullers Extra Special Bitter.

[Guess]

The Soccer World Cup over the last four decades is becoming tedious and repetitive. Many efforts have been made to make the competition more global rather than a just a contest between the European and South American giants of soccer. However whatever steps are taken by FIFA the same old set of teams end up in the last eight with maybe one or two outsiders having had a lucky streak.

This has happened yet again this year with Ukraine and England getting a little further than their abilities would suggest. Ukraine have now been knocked out by the greatest of all European Soccer Super Powers, Italy, despite the presence of Ukraine’s superstar striker, Andriy Shevchenko doing his utmost to keep Ukraine in the competition.

The almighty power and skill of the Italians overwhelmed the newest nation ever to reach the last eight. Italy, despite jealous criticism from other less competent nations managed a 3 – 0 win without receiving a single yellow card.

My guess is that England will join Ukraine tomorrow leaving the World’s Superpowers of Germany, Portugal, Italy and one of Brasil or France to battle it out to the end.

For future competitions I suggest that a handicap system is introduced. Handicaps are already in place in many sports and have proved successful.

The way to achieve this is by using an expanding and contracting goal. With the technology available today it would be easy to implement such technology. It could even be taken a step further and allow for a change in structure of the goal frameworks. An elaborate handicapping formula could be calculated based upon FIFA world ratings, previous World Cup performances and the IQ of the individual players and coaches. The precise details of the algorithm are unimportant as nobody understands the existing ranking and seeding system anyway. It is extremely complex and then to make it absolutely impossible to decipher, it is specified in French.

The posts could be allowed to be raised above the crossbar in and H shape so that the US, New Zealand, Australia, some Pacific Island Nations and Wales would have a more familiar looking target. This would also allow for Peter Crouch to score goals.

By changing the target area to comply with the nations handicap would allow for small desert island nations like Kiribati, Palau and the Solomon Islands, whose training would mostly have been done with a coconut, to actually compete in a World Cup Finals.

Large but sparsely populated countries like Mauritania, Namibia and Canada could also have a chance.

Even frozen outcrops of land that support only tiny populations where humans are outnumbered one million to one by sheep and/or penguins like the Faroe Islands, the Falkland Islands and Scotland, might even make it to the finals.

Whereas the Super Powers would be attacking goals of a similar size to those used in Ice Hockey, the smaller nations like those listed above would have to hit target goals that stretched the entire width of the pitch. Those in between would be aiming at something more like the traditional goal used currently but varying in size depending upon their handicap.

I believe that this would introduce fun into the competition which is now becoming far too serious and political for most of the World’s 197 countries.

Many other features could be introduced such as one of the sides providing their national cuisine at half time instead of Orange segments. This would then make it very desirable to meet a national team such as Thailand, India or Mexico whereas teams would do everything in their power to avoid nations like Somalia, Greenland and England.

[lomuamart]

Cor, I never realised it was so important.

[caller]

I thought the national cuisine of Somalia - for men at least - was "khat", which could do wonders for their results if presented to the uninitiated. Thats assuming that the home team, having consumed this for their pre-match meal, actually manage to rouse themselves and board the coach taking them to the game in the first place? If not, they'll just start another war instead.

[Big Boy]

My guess is that England will join Ukraine tomorrow

Been dreaming again Guess? Or just wishful thinking?

The almighty power and skill of the Italians overwhelmed the newest nation ever to reach the last eight.

You mean that Italy got a lucky draw (was it luck, or was it paid for?)

Whereas the Super Powers would be attacking goals of a similar size to those used in Ice Hockey

I think that would be quite fair - with 'pin-point accurate' David Beckham in our team, it wouldn't be a problem for England. Trouble is, it would probably restrict victory to either England or Brazil. At least with current system, the others have a bit of a chance. Even with the Italian's funding, if they didn't have the skill to hit the smaller target, they could never be adjudged to have scored - therefore, they could never win.

[Guess]

My guess is that England will join Ukraine tomorrow

Been dreaming again Guess? Or just wishful thinking?

I did not mean that England would be joining Ukraine literally. In fact they will be traveling in the completely opposite direction 24 hours later (well apart from the smarter ones like David Beckham and Owen Hargreaves who made decisions to broaden their outlook and play their game in countries where the level of soccer and access to some of the inside tips regarding behavior and choice of underwear was more likely to improve their performance). It was a metaphorical statement meaning that England too would no longer be required to compete in the competition and would be flying out of the fatherland. This of course could all change if the Armanis, Guccis can come up with a plan along with the Beckhams and the Lampardis to score a couple of goals. England, as we know have no strikers whatsoever and will be relying on the top midfielders to hit the target. Of course England have already prepared the way by crippling the Ronaldo (Christiano) boy and handing two of the key Portuguese players red cards. All this was achieved by England’s greatest allies and neighbors, the Dutch.

I thought the national cuisine of Somalia - for men at least - was "khat", which could do wonders for their results if presented to the uninitiated. Thats assuming that the home team, having consumed this for their pre-match meal, actually manage to rouse themselves and board the coach taking them to the game in the first place? If not, they'll just start another war instead.

The introduction of khat would indeed make a very interesting half time substitute for oranges. The game would then indeed be, in the words of one of the English commentary literary intellectual geniuses “A game of two halvesâ€

[PeteC]

I think this forum is either going to be alive with joy come tomorrow morning or, there may be few posts for at least a week or so. I indeed hope the former.

No one has mentioned the Germany/Argentina game last night in detail. Germany won by luck. They couldn't pass, they couldn't set up plays, and they couldn't even dribble the ball for more than 5 seconds without it being taken away from them. They all looked exhausted before the first half ended...like they spent the previous night in the pub. BOOOOO! The sub goal tender for Argentina was the weak link that cost them the match.

Perhaps it was another "secret strategy" to throw off Italy on Wednesday? Pete

PS: I predict England and France in the Semi, and England and Italy in the Final. If not I'll eat ??????LOL

[Bamboo Grove]

This was in yesterday's Bangkok Post. Quote from Gary Lineker:
"Football is a simple game; you play 120 minutes and then Germany win on penalties." How correct he was.

[Big Boy]

in countries where the level of soccer and access to some of the inside tips regarding behavior

Guess, I've got a short clip of the Italian Team in training which I will e-mail to you later, when I get home from the England vs Portugal party. It might be a few hours late because there will probably be a fair bit of partying to celebrate another famous English victory.