Manners

[Norseman]

A very descriptive story shadow.
What makes some people behave this badly?
Is it some sort of farang condescension? Farang superiority?
Or is it simply lack of manners?
Must be the upbringing then.

[johnnyk]

I like to say please and thank you wherever I am.
Look at it this way, those three little words immediately elevate you above 80% of other people. Even I can look good this way!

[tezzer]

Wai, not a hand shake is it left or right,did i use my right hand to pick my nose or my left hand to wipe my arse i can't remember.Never mind.

[Dirkepirk]

Allowances are made for our ignorance/cultural differences. I think a big smile goes a long way if you are not comfortable wai-ing.

I agree. The first days in Thailand I did not wai at all. Not because I didn't want to, but because it's such a different manner of greeting from what I'm used to. So when Thai were wai-ing me I still had my hands down. Later I got used to it and managed to wai in time. But even when I didn't It didn't seem to be a problem as I always smiled back to them and said hello.

[Randy Cornhole]

I have always found when opening a door to a Thai, whether it be 7/11 or the like, they never thank you or smile, They just walk through or let the door close on you. Small point but as someone who was taught manners is gets to me.

[PeteC]

I have always found when opening a door to a Thai, whether it be 7/11 or the like, they never thank you or smile, They just walk through or let the door close on you. Small point but as someone who was taught manners is gets to me.

Same here Randy, though I've had some experiences where you do get a smile and a "ka" or "krup" in return. My bigger problem is with people who block aisles in stores having family meetings, with no idea whatsoever that they are inconviencing others. And....my favorite....car/mc drivers who have no idea what planet they are on or what is behind them or beside them when they decide to do something....usually at 5 KPH when everyone else is going 80.

The thing about the wai is a thread in itself. You shouldn't wai a youngster or a service person even if he/she wais you. If you do, you'll usually get a giggle in return as they know. Just a smile and a nod of the head is the expected reply. You also need to determine the social status of the person who wais you (quickly) as if he/she is higher status then you, your wai should be higher than theirs. If lower, lower. It's an art to do it correctly. I'll do a little yahoo or google later as I think there is something on there that explains the wai process in detail. Pete

[H2ODunc]

Hi all, in respose to the post yes I do Wai back when I'm Wai'd and from what I'm led to believe it is appreciated, May be wrong cant say for sure, I didnt think that it was soley associated with being a Buddist ,Again not sure but would like to know if theres anyone out there that does know Apart from that I dont think I have met very many ignorant Thais, met a lot more ignorant farang, I think it is how you treat them. just my ramblings Cheers Dunc

[PeteC]

These two links explain things well concerning the wai. Pete

http://www.1stopchiangmai.com/how_to/wai/

http://www.thaistudents.com/thebeach/thaiwai.html

[H2ODunc]

Cheers mate will check em out after the Grand Prix COME ON BUTTON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jaime]

The thing about the wai is a thread in itself.

And here it is:

http://www.huahinafterdark.com/forum/vi ... +etiquette

I also agree with Randy and Pete about the door thing. Thai people can be very polite in formal situations but can come across as extremely ignorant in spontaneous situations, as described by Randy. Queuing, getting on buses, giving up seats for elderly/pregnant ladies etc are other situations where I sometimes wonder how 'polite' they really are. Maybe 'thoughtful' would be a better word to use than 'polite', as what constitutes politeness varies according to the cultural norms.

[PeteC]

The thing about the wai is a thread in itself.

And here it is:

http://www.huahinafterdark.com/forum/vi ... +etiquette

I also agree with Randy and Pete about the door thing. Thai people can be very polite in formal situations but can come across as extremely ignorant in spontaneous situations, as described by Randy. Queuing, getting on buses, giving up seats for elderly/pregnant ladies etc are other situations where I sometimes wonder how 'polite' they really are. Maybe 'thoughtful' would be a better word to use than 'polite', as what constitutes politeness varies according to the cultural norms.

Thanks Jaime, that covers it. Concerning the "thoughtful" vs the "polite", my Thai partner simply says "....they are stupid, no school ever...". Not from my lips please note, but from a Thai. Pete

[Winkie]

Found this on the web about the Wai. Seems it is not related to Buddhism


Thai greeting
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The Thai greeting referred to as the Wai consists of a slight bow, with the palms pressed together in a prayer-like fashion.
[edit]

Origin

The wai originated from an ancient greeting that was done to show neither individual had any weapons. There exists multiple versions of the greeting based on class, gender, and age.

Winkie

[pinksquid]

I tend to smile and nod, but my hands are often full so wai-ing is difficult.

I was never Christian so the religious connection doesn't bother me, but that is a good thing to wonder about.

[richard]

Hey guys,

'When in Rome......'

We are guests and therefore should abide by their customs and rules

If you don't like it - move on

[Jockey]

[quote="Randy Cornhole"]I am always a bit wary of wai'ing as although it may seem polite, if you don't believe in buddha is it a bit meaningless? Do the Thais appreciate a wai from a westerner they know isn't a buddhist? who knows. A smile yes but a wai... I'm not sure - it smacks of double standards (to us). but then can the Thais comprehend this?
Maybe its best not to think so deep and just wai...hmmm.
I fear this may be a hot bed of contention but what the hell... let the games commence.[/quote

If you knew the origins of the 'handshake' you might feel uncomfortable about that too Randy!