Are you an Expat???
Am I an Expat??
Theres no easy way of explaining this one but in lifes quest for answers look no further than taking the 'EXPAT TEST!'
THE EXPAT TEST
The more points you attain the better.....
For each question (truthfully) choose only one answer that applies to you....
No cheating, talking or other mischief! The Moderators are now Invigilating!:twisted:
The time allowed for this test is 10 minutes or the time it takes the Moderating king to drink 4 Bottles of Chang!
Enough said and let the test begin!:|
Stage one - Length of Stay, travel and documentation.
How many times have you visited thailand previously?
Never - 0
1 to 5 times - 1
6 to 10 times - 2
10 times + - 3
What plane ticket did you arrive in the country on?
A closed Return ticket - 0
An 6 month open return - 1.5
A one-way all or nothing ticket! - 2
What visa is currently stamped in your passport?
A tourist visa - 0
A double entry tourist visa - 1
A single entry visa non-imm 'o' - 2
A multi entry visa non-imm 'o' - 3
non-imm 'b' (business visa) - 4
Retirement visa! - 6
I don't need a visa stamp! I hold a thai passport/citizenship! - 15
Stage 2 - Country specific questions...
What driving license do you hold?
None - 0
UK driving license (bike or car) - 1
Thai driving license (car) - 3
Thai driving license (bike and car) - 4
How much thai language can you speak?
Nothing apart from very rudimentary basic bargirl thai phrases! - 0
Basic phrases and numbers - 0.5
Colloquial thai - 2
Advanced thai (hold a good conversation) - 3
Fluent/Native speaker thai (and writing) - 5
What line of work are you involved in?
Nothing at all! - 1 ( 2 If Retired)
Teacher / Divemaster - 2
Dive Instructor / Bar Manager - 3
Company / Office worker - 4
Offshore work - 4.5
Offshore work in thailand (Rigs etc) - 5
If you are working do you hold a work permit?
No - 0 You cheeky monkey!
Yes - 3
What is your accommodation?
Hotel - 0
Guesthouse - 1
Renting a House - 2
Ownership of a house (via a company) - 3
Ownership of house (via a thai) - 3.5
What vehicles do you have as your own?
Nothing - 0
Bicycle - 0.5
Motorbike (Rental) - 1
Motorbike (owned in thai name without access to papers) - 1.5
Motorbike (owned in thai name with papers) - 2.5
Motorbike (owned in your name with papers) - 3
Car (owned in thai name without access to papers) - 3
Car (owned in thai name with access papers) - 4
Car (owned in your name with papers) - 5
What finances support your living while in thailand?
Cash in the bank - 1
Cash in the bank + income from pension / assets - 2
Cash in the bank + income from work - 3
Cash in the bank + income from pension / assets and income from work - 4
I have so much cash i never have worry about other sources of income!! - 10
END OF TEST
This concludes the EXPAT TEST! Please sign your test sheets accordingly and pass them to a moderator for marking!
Well lets see how you've done
SCORES -
2 - 8 Fail! The results seem to indicate you are a tourist! Enjoy you're stay! Grade F-
9 - 15 Fail! But this result seems to show you have some roots here in thailand but you still need some effort to get towards the next step in expatdom! Grade D+
16 - 23 Border-line Pass! This score indicates you are either an expat / Semi Expat, based here in thailand for short to long durations at time. You can consider this score showing you to be an 'Honoury Expat!'. Look out for deserving expat-wannabes! They need your help in passing the test! Grade B-
24 + Pass! WELL DONE! You have passed the Expat Test with flying colours! With this accolade Thailand is surely yours for the taking! Just take care out there on your adventures! Grade A+
Please note this is only a half-serious test and should not seriously reflect a persons expat status.