GIRLFRIEND SAYS ITS OVER AFTER 2 AND HALF YEARS

[TingTongJohn]

Its a numbers game and she found someone with more numbers. Its sad that love/Passion can be undone by Thai Baht and a nicer car. My ex who is Thai as we all know told me about her friend who had been seeing a D.J in Bangkok for 5 years and loved him but she left him because she met a richer older guy in Phuket and could provide a better life for her. I can relate to the Op`s friends feelings as that is basically what my ex did to me and our 2 daughters after 8 years. All I can say is it will get better and try to breathe.

[Lung Per]

Sorry for your loss. Fortunately, there ARE many happy and lasting relationships.

[Arlo]

What is the age difference? Not all Thais are money hungry. Maybe it was just time to move on. I know its hard to believe but Thais are people and have feelings like everyone else. Breaking up happens in the western world also. Its part of life.

[Gérard]

What is the age difference? Not all Thais are money hungry. Maybe it was just time to move on. I know its hard to believe but Thais are people and have feelings like everyone else. Breaking up happens in the western world also. Its part of life.

Right, and big differences in age, culture, social level and difficulty in communicating makes it really difficult.
Older wealthy educated fat man with a young uneducated slim beauty from a poor Isaan family can hardly pair up...

[Jose]

I think she has behaved in the correct manner, she has had enough, she has told him and has not tried to keep the cash flowing.

If she was only after money she would have tried to keep the cash coming in from both parties.

[jumusman]

Seeing as nobody has asked this and it's a very relevant question. What's the age difference ?

[kirkyboy]

He is 55 and she is 25. He is still shattered by the breakup but, has moved forward and is in contact with a girl via internet and is meeting her on his 3 month holiday next week.
A good wake up call and will treat the next journey in LOS very differently regarding
showering her with money etc. As another friend keeps telling us, they are all cheaters and liars. Maybe he's right.

[dtaai-maai]

As another friend keeps telling us, they are all cheaters and liars. Maybe he's right.

Well, I still maintain I've seen nothing to indicate that the lady in this case was either. Those who are most vitriolic about 'cheaters and liars' tend to be those who've been bitten, and those who've been bitten often seem, perhaps unsurprisingly, to have been bitten more than once.

There's no recipe for success, but desperation isn't usually an ingredient. Your friend would probably be best advised to sit back and relax for a while, instead of which he's straight back on the hunt.

Looking at it objectively, when you're getting on for 60, the apparently urgent requirement for a girlfriend 30+ years younger suggests that a long-term genuine relationship, or at least weeding out all the cheaters and liars, is going to require a lot of good fortune.

[dalmatiandave]

He is 55 and she is 25. He is still shattered by the breakup but, has moved forward and is in contact with a girl via internet and is meeting her on his 3 month holiday next week.
A good wake up call and will treat the next journey in LOS very differently regarding
showering her with money etc. As another friend keeps telling us, they are all cheaters and liars. Maybe he's right.

Unless he is thinking of staying here permanently why doesn't he just come here and play the field. After such an upset he should just come here and enjoy himself, why the need to be 'with someone'. If he likes the chat up on the internet (a lottery as far as I am concerned) then don't set up a committed liaison, arrange to meet many and he may stand a better chance. I worry that this 'shattered but moving on' is just a prelude for another tale of woe.
Sorry to offer a negative note but this need to be with one girl whilst on holiday is not going to offer a good solution. There are very few sponsors sending money to Thailand after their holiday that aren't funding another guys freebie.
As has been said a long term relationship has more chance of success if the guy is staying in Thailand on a permanent basis whatever the age difference.

I say good luck but tread slowly.

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[Roel]

As has been said a long term relationship has more chance of success if the guy is staying in Thailand on a permanent basis whatever the age difference.

Agree apart from the 'whatever the age difference' part.

Being a 55-year old male myself believe me I can understand he is attracted to 25-year old females. Aren't we all? And in this country they are available on every street corner but I would say forget the serious relationship.
25-year old women are NOT physically attracted to 55-year old men despite what many of them might tell your friend. They want his money but for sex they prefer a 20 to 30 year old (preferably Thai) guy any time. Only natural and only a matter of time.

Once bitten, twice shy.

[GLCQuantum]

I have to agree with the above.

I think as long as you know the arrangement, when entering big age difference relationships, it can go smoothly.

* for the older man he gets a nice young woman at a cost. If he is willing to accept that then things will go as smoothly as is possible in the unnatural relationship.

* for the younger woman, there is NO physical attraction. It's a well paid job for her. She will pleasure the old man as a means to security.

If both parties understand their side of the deal, there is no reason a happy relationship can't unfold... A relationship it is - Throw the delusional 'love' word out the window... It will save some stress.

An easier solution is... Date people your own age. You may, just may, find true love. T

[theprice01]

An easier solution is... Date people your own age.

lol, i couldn't agree more.

a 30 year difference in age would be hard with someone from the same country, let alone with someone from the otherside of the world.

[dalmatiandave]

Plenty of guys get screwed and will continue to get screwed with whatever age the girl they are with, they are just inexperienced in relationships with Asian women and as the word respect figures highly in the girls vocabulary they will just take advantage when given the chance.

The thing for me is to remain in control of your destiny, ring fence your finances and only pass on what money is needed to maintain the household. Buying or building a house and sticking it in the girlfriends name or buying her a car is tantamount to disaster at any age difference and it is not for me. I don't remember doing that in the UK. My present girlfriend of nearly 4 years has her own business which she funds herself, she could leave tomorrow and she would be fine, more importantly so would I and all my finances and assets would go with me. We have a good relationship but it is good because every so often a little word of advice offers the girl the chance to pack her bags if needed, the advice gets 'her' to pull her socks up. That respect of knowing how the ground lies is more important than the age difference, that age difference for me just being a bonus, that's all.

I am sure deep down we all know guys who, smitten, are going to get burnt big time. It's as sure as night follows day. Some are predisposed to it and Thailand just highlights it more. We just need to make sure we do our best to keep it on an even keel and if the worst happens, and it can to all of us, then we need to leave with our finances secure but with our heads held high, not hanging between our legs.

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[void]

I had a (western) girlfriend tell me once, she would never seriously date anyone twice her age. .... or saying that differently, perhaps a man should never seriously date anyone less than 1/2 of their age. And even that is pushing it.

I am 60, married with a Thai wife (who is 13 years younger) and fortunately we have education and many interests in common. Having the education and interests in common really helps to overcome the culture gap, and overcome the age gap. I suspect I would have serious trouble wrt any long term relationship with anyone 30 years younger than myself. Commonality wrt some interests and education can only go so far. Three decades of life can cause a massive difference in one's experience and views, when if one has an additional culture gap, that risks any differences being insurmountable.

Still, I found the "max double one's age" (or 1/2 one's age) an interesting rule of thumb perspective.